I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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