Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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