physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
