I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I've blown a few things in my day
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize