have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
