He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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