I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize