i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
