What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
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