Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Randomize
