How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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