maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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