How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
