in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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