just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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