Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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