nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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