I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
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