my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
