She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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