He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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