Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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