I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
