I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
