There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
