only if we run a train.
done.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize