The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
