I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Randomize
