this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize