I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
My butt remains clenched, sir.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
