I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize