She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize