My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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