If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
