U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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