I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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