what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
