she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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