drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize