Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize