so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
