whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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