My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
