Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
