Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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