I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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