is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
