If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize