But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
