I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
