Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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