Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I wish you could order shots online.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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